My New York City Subway Rules With A Hint of Sarcasm

November 12, 2011 1 Comment »
My New York City Subway Rules With A Hint of Sarcasm

New York City Subway Rules With A Hint of Sarcasm

  1. Please, please, please cut your nails on the train. There is definitely no chance that your nails will go flying all over the place.
  2. Beverages are fine, but don’t bother putting a lid or top on your coffee any other type of drink; God forbid you don’t spill it on another passenger. There seems to be a trend of people, during the morning rush hours, bringing uncovered bottles and cups aboard trains and buses.
  3. Please enjoy your fried fish dinner on the train. Your fellow commuters won’t mind the smell!
  4. If you’re on escalator – well, a working one – two simple rules :
    1. Stay to the RIGHT if you wish to stand still and ride the escalator.
    2. Stay to the LEFT if you wish to walk up the escalator.
  1. Please take your book-bag off and place it between your legs when on the subway. Ladies, there is nothing worse than a pocketbook or purse poking someone in the back.
  2. Lower your voice. Trust me, the person on the other end of your phone can hear you.
  3. Move your crap off the seat! If a seat is available, I don’t want to have to ask you to move your bag.
  4. Reading the paper is important, but if you’re standing up, ensure that you have one hand on the paper and one hand on a hand rail.
  5. If you think a person deserves a seat, just give it up. I can only hope when I’m 70 and need to ride the subway or bus, someone will give up their seat.
  6. Please do not walk between subway cars; the fine is not cheap, and hey, you could die.
  7. Plan an alternative route; the NYCT subway has working parts older than 100 years old. There is a chance your train may get diverted to another line, so have a contingency plan in place. If the 2 Train is running on the 5 Line, know the stop at which you need to get off. If there is no subway service, have an alternate mode of transport, like a bus, figured out beforehand.
  8. Try not to lean your entire body onto holding poles; this prevents other people from being able to hold onto them.
  9. Be nice to your fellow New Yorkers.

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  • Justin W.

    More etiquette posts please!  I enjoyed the sarcasm.